You and Me Against The World

Mothers Day is hard even though it’s a Hallmark holiday, let me tell you a hard one. After losing my mom I used to get so jealous and show resentment of those that had their mom. I always used to tell Blair when she was a little girl that all in all I may have only had my mom Barbara for twelve years, but having my mom, I was grateful. I was given unconditional love, she taught and showed me so much in such little time. 

When I meet my friends moms and other moms in general I used to be jealous but as time went on I learned all moms are not equal. My mom was the perfect mom for me. I learned that there are moms who yell, who scream, who lie, who cheat and steal. Who love bomb and use manipulation tactics. This for me rings true especially knowing what a true bad mom is after having my step monster and then my true genuine mother. I know there are many moms out there like this. I feel so awful for those that don’t have a good mom. I know we shouldn’t judge other moms out there but I don’t want to pretend that bad moms don’t exist. My mom gave me my own autonomy. 

They say you chose your parents as a soul and I am so happy I chose my mommy. My mom was 21 when she had me, and I am not sure our boundaries were quite aligned because she was so young.  One of my favorite stories is getting on her and her singing the children’s classic There Is A Monkey On My Back… On My Back. We would watch the television show Soul Train together. We would do lots of crafts on Saturdays, all the Decoupage, puzzles, paint by numbers, wax on bottles. My mom had a knack for cooking and loved it too. If something wasn’t right she would throw it out and start again. She instilled my palette, at a young age I liked artichokes, lobster, Duck, (oh wow I am hungry just thinking about it). We would sit down to an appetizer salad course dinner and then dessert. She loved entertaining for holidays. I guess that’s where I get that from. 

She was a quick thinker, one day she knew I was bothering our dog. So my mom asked what I did to the dog, and I said nothing of course. My mom knew how to motivate me with her tricks. She said “Stacey, I’m going to take the dog to the vet and he can talk to the animal like Dr. Dolittle.” I remember being scared and saying “I just shocked him a little” meaning choked. My mom had many friends and people tell me how smart she was and whatever she did she did so well. In our little time together so many memories were made for an eternity and not a minute goes by that I don’t think about my beautiful mom. 

Whenever Blair and I get into an argument I always feel like I don’t know how to be a mom to a teenager or to a young adult. Being a mom is hard but Blair assures me I do know how. I am a mom by showing unconditional true love in its purest form. I know how to be a mom because I am not controlling and let Blair make her own decisions. It’s always been my mom and I against the world and now it is my daughter and I against the world. You know the Helen Reddy song?  So this Mothers Day and every Mothers day moving forward we are going to love each other in its purest form remember my mom and make lasting memories for all eternity.